


flash thompson gets an internship.

by turtle_bean



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Adopted Peter Parker, Apologies, Attempt at Humor, Bullying, Confusion, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Cryptid Peter Parker, Cryptids, Dead May Parker (Spider-Man), Flash Thompson Makes a Friend, Flash Thompson Needs a Hug, Flash Thompson Redemption, Fluff, Genius Peter Parker, Hostage Situations, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Interns & Internships, Laboratories, Mentions of Hello Kitty, Misunderstandings, Multi, Not even tho, POV Flash Thompson, POV Outsider, Peter Parker Calls Tony Stark "Dad", Peter Parker Saves The Day, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Peter Parker is a Mess, Peter Parker is the Cryptid, Protective Tony Stark, Redemption, Science, Skilled Peter Parker, Stark Industries, Stark Industries Employee Flash Thompson, Texting, The Author Regrets Nothing, The Interns Are Confusion, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Is Not Helping, Tony Stark Loves Peter Parker, Troll Tony Stark, Why Did I Write This?, a bit - Freeform, almost, cheesy ending, he gets one, i apologize about that, i think i was half asleep when i wrote this, my life is complete, no beta we die like gladiators, otherwise known as, peter parker is the avengers tower cryptid, please dont hate it, sorry - Freeform, tony stark is soft for one (1) peter parker, very briefly mentioned - Freeform, wait thats an actual tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:26:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29043093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/turtle_bean/pseuds/turtle_bean
Summary: To Eugene Thompson:We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the Stark Industries internship program. Please arrive at Avengers Tower on Monday, February 1st, and use the enclosed access card to enter the employee elevator.[...]We look forward to our partnership.Stark Industries.---or, flash gets an internship at SI and learns about the cryptid of the tower.ft: redeemed flash thompson, tony stark being a troll, and lots of hello kitty offerings.disclaimer: i do not own the mcu, nor the characters that i use in this fic, aside from my minor ocs (the interns)
Relationships: Flash Thompson & Other(s), Flash Thompson & SI Interns, I said what I said - Relationship, Peter Parker & Flash Thompson, Peter Parker & Other(s), Peter Parker & SI Interns, Peter Parker & Stark Industries, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Tony Stark & SI Interns, flash thompson & stark industries interns, peter parker & stark industries interns
Comments: 33
Kudos: 689





	flash thompson gets an internship.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Comeuppance](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18699151) by [TheLuckyLady13](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLuckyLady13/pseuds/TheLuckyLady13). 
  * Inspired by [research and disaster](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22827064) by [blueh](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueh/pseuds/blueh). 
  * Inspired by [Coincidences and Superheroes](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28951650) by [patrochilles_trash](https://archiveofourown.org/users/patrochilles_trash/pseuds/patrochilles_trash). 



> [me, doing all of my work and then writing this fic instead of sleeping: this is productive!]  
> also - this work was kind of a mash-up of the works that inspired this. i used the idea of flash getting an internship, and i also really love cryptid peter parker, so this mess of a fic was born.  
> enjoy :)

“Eugene!” Mother called from the Dining Room. “A letter has come from Stark Industries!” 

Flash’s heart started pumping out of his chest, and he cautiously made his way to the Dining Room. “May I see it, Mother?” 

Mother turned the letter over in her hands and, after a few moments of anxiety where Flash didn’t think she would hand it over, she set the letter down on the table and looked at Flash expectantly. 

Eagerly, Flash ripped open the letter. 

_To Eugene Thompson:_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the Stark Industries internship program. Please arrive at Avengers Tower on Monday, February 1st, and use the enclosed access card to enter the employee elevator. FRIDAY, the Tower’s AI, will take you to your lab - Lab 12.A._

_This is a beginner lab, and you do not have access to any other floors of the Tower, except the lobby. Also, FRIDAY will not interact with you. She is extremely busy managing the Tower and the Starks/Avengers personal business, so do not be offended when she doesn’t respond to you._

_Every week, you will receive an assignment to complete, and once you are finished to your Lab Director’s satisfaction, you may pursue a personal project. Attached is a list of rules that we request you read over before you begin your internship._

_We look forward to our partnership._

_Stark Industries._

"Well?” Mother asked, raising her eyebrow expectantly. “I got in, Mother!” Flash exclaimed, clutching the letter to his chest, and Mother gave him a rare half-smile. 

“Very good, Eugene.” And she left the room, her heels clacking on the tile. 

Sighing softly, Flash checked over the rule page: 

_Stark Industries Internship Rules:_

_\- To request a material that is not stocked, ask your Lab Director._

_\- To use a material in the locked_ _cabinets_ _, ask your Lab Director._

_\- If you encounter an Avenger, do not initiate conversation._

_\- If you encounter Mr. Stark, do not hand him anything or talk to him._

_\- Do not discuss anything you see at your lab or at the Tower._

_\- In the event of an emergency, follow your Lab Director._

_\- Do not attempt to access any labs/floors other than your assigned lab/floor._

_\- Maintain an appropriate dress code._

_\- You must log at least twelve hours of work a week._

_\- Keep the noise level down._

And several other self-explanatory rules. Flash nodded to himself, grinned, and took a picture of his acceptance letter, sending a picture to the Acadec chat. 

**[the nerd team]**

**the flash:** guess who got an actual si internship? [acceptanceletter.jpeg] 

**the flash:** cant wait to expose parkers lies 

**mmj** **:** hm. 

**ned** **in the chair:** hmmmmmmmmmm 

**sall-e:** great for you flash 

**cindyeet** **:** lmao no one cares abt peters internship except u bro 

**bbrant** **:** *sigh.* 

**peet** **:** uhhhhmmm good job flash 

Ha! It was so incredibly obvious that Peter was lying, and Flash couldn’t wait to expose him for that. It wasn’t fair how perfect Peter was, how much his parents cooed over his projects and test scores. They should be cooing over _Flash’s_ test scores. That wasn’t. Fucking. Fair. 

So, when Monday came, Flash eagerly fingered his access card and entered the daunting and magnificent Avengers Tower. 

“Hello,” Flash said, flashing his patented Charismatic Smile to the unimpressed receptionist. “I’m Flash Thompson, here for an internship? Where’s the employee elevator?” Flash gestured to the five different elevators around the lobby. 

Sighing, the receptionist answered. “That one over there is for business meetings, over there is for guests, right back there is for the Stark family, that one’s for the Avengers and their guests, and back there is the employee elevator.” 

“Thank you, Ma’am,” Flash said politely, making his way to the final elevator she gestured to, and shivering a bit when it moved without his command. The ride was only a few moments, and Flash exited, puffing his chest out. 

Opening the door to the lab, he found a woman with curly red hair and boxy clear glasses holding a clipboard, and Flash guessed that she was the Lab Director. 

“Hello?” Flash asked, waving slightly at the woman. “I’m Flash Thompson, here for my internship?” Flash half-expected her to tell him that the acceptance letter was a mistake, that it had been meant for _Parker,_ but instead she smiled and nodded slightly. 

“Hello, Mr. Thompson, my name is Avery Adams and I will be your Lab Director.” Avery led him over to a sleek table fit with a microscope and a desktop computer. “This will be your lab table. Do you have any questions?” Flash grinned and shook his head. “Very well, for your first assignment, please build and code a robot. The robot can serve any purpose you wish. Understand?” 

Flash nodded. His first assignment would be a perfect way to prove himself, and he would definitely live up to the challenge. 

\--- 

“Good job, Mr. Thompson,” Avery said with a smile. “You’ve passed the test.” 

“The test?” Flash asked, cocking his head to the side. “I thought that this was an assignment?” 

“We always give new interns an easy assignment to begin with, and we observe how much effort they put into their work, as well as how they interact with the other interns, and from this we decide whether to keep or discard that intern. You passed! You are now an official intern.” 

Grinning from ear to ear, Flash thanked Avery. 

“We got him?” Alicia, a student at NYU asked, to which Avery nodded. 

“We need to initiate him,” Jonah said, and all of the interns winked at each other. 

“Initiate?” 

Jonah pulled Flash over to the break room, and the interns followed them. Someone dimmed the lights. 

“One year and four months ago, Jenny Watkins, now a higher-level intern, was wandering this very lab, alone. She was about to log out for the day, when she saw a figure out of the corner of her eye.” Jonah grinned at Flash’s bewildered look, and nodded at Li. 

“Jenny says that she went to investigate who was in the lab, and came across a boy, no older than 15, climbing the shelves and taking a bottle of Salicylic Acid from the locked cabinets. The boy wore no badge, and he had no letter of permission from the Lab Director.” 

Abraham continued. “Because of those reasons, Jenny decided to corner the boy, and ask him what he thought he was doing. The boy whipped his head around to stare at her, hissed, and left with the Salicylic Acid. That was the first sighting of the Cryptid.” 

Next was Ciara. “There are officially three other sightings. The next sighting was by Dennis Green, a former Lab Director for Lab 29.B. It was midnight, and the labs were shut down for the night. Dennis had left his coat in the lab, so he had gone to retrieve it, when he saw the Cryptid typing on the mother code for Project Z. This was a few months after Jenny’s tale, and it was already famous around the Tower, as well as her description: a young, pale boy with curly brown hair and bambi eyes. Dennis quickly recognized the boy as the Cryptid, and ran away before telling him to stop ruining Project Z, which had been a pain in Lab 29.B’s ass for the past month. The next morning, the code was finished.” 

Flash raised an eyebrow as Maia began speaking. “Cryptid Tale #3 was told by both Lizzy Jones and Michael Boe, mechanical engineering scientists for Lab 63.A, a pretty high-level lab. Lizzy and Michael were eating lunch when a knife-wielding Roomba, also fitted with a video recorder, zoomed into the lab. The scientists, understandably, screamed, and a few seconds later, the Cryptid entered and scooped up the Roomba, apologizing for it, and saying that it had developed a mind of its own and to never install an AI in an evil Roomba.” 

Marcos nodded seriously and then continued the story. “Some don’t count the next one, giving that it wasn’t actually a sighting of the Cryptid. Lab 34.D found a sticky-note in the place of where a torch had previously been. On the sticky-note, it said: ‘sorry for taking your torch, i’ll bring it back, my friend needs it for her replica of mr stark made out of iron man toys!’ Nobody believed this, and the Lab Director put in a request for a new torch. Later that day, however, Mr. Anthony Edward Stark returned with the torch, grinning, and many interns say that they saw a mini-Mr. Stark sticking out of his pocket.” 

Eleanor stifled a giggle at Flash’s shocked expression, and then resumed the initiation. “The final sighting of the Cryptid was by our very own Jonah Wilson.” Jonah nodded seriously. “Jonah, you want to go again and tell him?” 

“Ms. Potts has this program where every other month she chooses one lucky intern to shadow her. I was chosen two months ago, and I got to attend her meetings alongside her and take minutes. I was sitting in the meeting, writing, when there was a small crash outside the meeting room. I don’t think anyone except me and Ms. Potts heard it. Ms. Potts glanced up, so I did as well, and who did I find but the Cryptid, holding a piece of the Iron Man armor, as well as several other important projects, and trying to gather the project he had dropped on the floor. When he saw me staring at him, he leapt away like a goddamn superhero. And get this – Ms. Potts _smiled_ at him.” 

Flash blinked. And then he blinked again. “What the fuck?” 

“Great!” Cheered Grayson. “Now that you’ve heard the mystery of the Cryptid, you’re officially an SI intern. How does it feel?” 

“Good...So Ms. Potts and Mr. Stark know the Cryptid?” 

“It seems that way,” said Li. “Who knows, though? He’s the Cryptid.” 

\--- 

A week later, Flash was working on an actual SI project! His job was to fix Bugs 41.21A through 41.34C on Mark X of the Stark Phone. 

He would go in immediately after school, head home for dinner and schoolwork, and then return from 8:00 PM to 10:00 PM, when the labs would close. On early mornings, Flash would log a few minutes at the lab before heading to school, and Avery would usually be the only one there during these days. 

On one of these particular days, Flash swiped his access card and encountered a pale Amy. “I saw him,” she whispered. “I saw the Cryptid. He used the coffee machine.” She pointed a shaky finger at the offending gadget. 

Flash’s eyes widened and went over to the coffee machine, before turning and facing Avery again. “What did he look like?” 

“Curly brown hair, bambi eyes. He seemed around 16. He was wearing pink Hello Kitty pajama pants and an Iron Man pajama shirt. He, uh, he was grumbling something? I don’t know, I don’t know, it was something like: ‘locking me out of my lab,’ and ‘coffee?’” Avery shook her head in wonder and sat down. “I need to text the group chat.” 

“You have a group chat?” 

Avery’s eyes widened. “Shit! We forgot to add you. Hold on, I’ll add you right now. 

_[the_ _l.d_ _added you to: lab 12.c]_

list of participants: 

\- the l.d [avery] 

\- the one who saw the cryptid [jonah] 

\- the one who brings in doughnuts [eleanor] 

\- the actual genius [alicia] 

\- the brain cell of the lab [ciara] 

\- gO TO SLEEP [li] 

\- the one who touched thor’s hammer [abraham] 

\- the pizza heathen [maia] 

\- the vegan [grayson] 

\- the vine master [marcos] 

\- the newbie [flash] 

_[the l.d is online]_

_[flash is online]_

**the** **l.d** **:** hey yall, i added flash 

_[the one who touched_ _thor’s_ _hammer is online]_

_[the one who touched_ _thor’s_ _hammer renamed flash: the newbie]_

**the newbie:** hey 

**the** **l.d** **:** NOW LISTEN TO WHAT HAPPENED TO ME TODAY 

**the** **l.d** **:** im waiting for every single one of you idiots to be online 

_[the actual genius is online]_

_[the vine master is online]_

_[the vegan is online]_

_[the one who brings in doughnuts is online]_

_[the one who saw the cryptid is online]_

_[the pizza heathen is online]_

_[the brain cell of the lab is online]_

**the brain cell of the lab:** some of us have class, ms. adams. 

**the l.d:** ITS IMPORTANT 

**the** **l.d** **:** I KNOW YOU’RE AWAKE LI GET ON HERE 

_[_ _gO_ _TO SLEEP is online]_

**the** **l.d** **:** i saw the cryptid 

**the pizza heathen:** w h a t t h e f u c k 

_[the vine master renamed the one who saw the cryptid: the_ _og_ _one who saw the cryptid]_

**the** **l.d** **:** he used our coffee machine. 

**the brain cell of the lab:** WHAT THE FUCK 

**the brain cell of the lab:** YOU COULD HAVE SAID THAT IT WAS ABOUT THE CRYPTID 

**the** **og** **one who saw the cryptid:** what do you mean he used the coffee machine?????

 **the** **l.d** **:** he used our goddamn coffee machine. he was wearing p a j a m a s 

**the actual genius:** that coffee machine is now an si artifact we need a new one to use 

**the l.d:** already put in a request 

**the vegan:** GHJGLFHFKHGL HE WAS WEARING PAJAMAS????? 

**the one who touched** **thor’s** **hammer:** @the newbie were u w her? 

**the newbie:** i wish, i got there and she told me about it :/ 

**gO** **TO SLEEP:** i am shooketh 

**the** **l.d** **:** you all need to bring in an offering for him today. when everyone gets here we will put all of our shit together and write him a note saying if he doesnt kill us he can have all of it. also come in with a theory. capische? 

**gO** **TO SLEEP:** capasche 

**the brain cell of the lab:** capasche 

**the** **og** **one who saw the cryptid:** capasche 

**the one who touched** **thor’s** **hammer:** capasche 

**the pizza heathen:** capasche 

**the actual genius:** capasche 

**the one who brings in doughnuts:** capasche 

**the vine master:** capasche 

**the vegan:** capasche 

**the newbie:** capasche 

\--- 

After school, Flash bought a package of Oreos from the convenience store and headed over to the lab. He thought about the mystery of the Cryptid for a while, and finally decided on his theory: clearly, the Cryptid was actually an alien. 

When Flash arrived, everyone else had already gotten there, and the offerings were set up around the coffee machine. Flash put his Oreos down next to Li’s economics essay and Jonah’s Hello Kitty sticker sheet. 

Everyone else had already written down their theories and had put them in a bucket alongside the offerings, so Flash hastily scribbled his down as well and sat down in the semi-circle the interns had formed. 

“Very well,” Avery said, mixing around the slips of paper. “The first theory is -” Avery picked up a piece of paper. “The Cryptid is a science experiment gone wrong.” Avery raised her eyebrow and Abraham raised his hands in mock defense. 

“You never know!” 

They continued going over and arguing about theories, until they had read each slip. “Alright, let’s vote,” Avery said. 

In the end, Ciara’s idea won: that the Cryptid was the ghost of Kevin Simmons, an intern that died in a house fire while he worked at SI, and that he had been de-aged in ghost form, because he had looked like the descriptions of the Cryptid when he was 16. 

Just in case they were wrong, though, they decided to leave the Cryptid all of their ideas in the bucket alongside the offering. 

“Now what?” Maia asked. 

“Hm. FRIDAY, if you are in contact with the boy we know as the Cryptid, can you tell him that whenever he wants, he can come collect his offering?” 

FRIDAY didn’t respond, but the interns nodded gravely, knowing that they had done everything in their power. 

\--- 

Flash set his alarm extra early, determined to make it to the lab to see if the Cryptid had accepted the offering. At 4:50 AM, the familiar BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! filled the room, and Flash immediately shut off the alarm, dressed, and arrived at Avengers Tower at 5:30 AM, earlier than Avery even headed into work. 

Unfortunately, Flash had forgotten that his access card did not work before 6:30 AM, when Avery arrived, so he did some of his schoolwork in the lobby, until he found Avery and Li heading into the Tower together. 

“Flash!” Li exclaimed, rushing over to him. “Come on!” 

The trio ran hurried into the employee elevator, Avery chugging down her coffee as she scrolled through her phone. Avery, as the Lab Director, had to scan her access card in order to open the lab for the interns, so she did so, and Flash and Li followed her lead. 

“Holy shit,” Avery whispered, immediately firing a message off in the Lab Chat. 

The offerings, coffee machine, and bucket were no longer there, and in its place was a letter. Flash ran over to the letter and read it out loud: 

“Dear Avery, Jonah, Eleanor, Alicia, Ciara, Li, Abraham, Maia, Grayson, Marcos, and Eugene, 

Thank you for the offering. I will consider your request. 

\- The Cryptid. 

P.S: Continue to leave me Hello Kitty offerings, and your chances go up.” 

Flash shakily handed the letter over to Avery, whose eyes widened. She took a picture of the letter and sent it to the chat, before heading to Amazon and immediately ordering Hello Kitty merchandise. 

“How did he know our names?” Li whispered, eyes cinched with worry. 

\--- 

That night, Flash used his Father’s credit card to purchase an oversized Hello Kitty stuffed animal, a Hello Kitty calendar, and several Hello Kitty posters. 

“Awesome, Flash!” Abraham took the offerings and put them next to the new coffee machine, alongside several other Hello Kitty items. 

\--- 

The next day, they were gone. Avery’s Amazon package came, so they set another offering. 

\--- 

The following day, the offerings were gone, but there was a note in their place: 

‘FOR FUCKS SAKE DO NOT LISTEN TO A WORD THAT DEMON SAYS.’ 

“Whatthefuckwhatthefuckwhatthefuck,” Li whispered under her breath. 

“Okay,” Ciara said. “Let’s think this through. There are a few possibilities. One: there are two cryptids. Identical twins? Two: someone is warning us about the Cryptid. Three: the Cryptid did not write those messages, and someone’s been trolling us. 

No one had any more Hello Kitty items, so they decided to cross their fingers and hope that the Cryptid wouldn’t be mad. 

\--- 

Li was the one who saw him. 

“I swear on my cat’s life!” She yelled for the seventh time. “It was him! He was wearing some graphic t-shirt and a pair of jeans, and he asked FRIDAY where ‘he’ hid his pajama pants!” 

“He has access to _FRIDAY_?!” Avery asked, sipping her coffee. 

“I’m telling you!” Li cried, indignant, and that was when Pepper fucking Potts decided to walk in. 

“Ms. Potts, Ma’am!” Avery exclaimed, leaving the group of conspirators. “Is there a reason for your visit? 

Ms. Potts smiled at Avery. “Yes, I was just wondering about the giant Hello Kitty stuffed animal in my penthouse? FRIDAY told me it came from here.” Avery’s jaw dropped. 

“The - the giant Hello Kitty is in your PENTHOUSE?” 

“Yes, could you please clear that up for me?” 

“I - I – I... we sacrificed it to the Cryptid. I...” 

“The Cryptid?” Ms. Potts asked, raising an eyebrow. By now, all of the interns had gathered around the two women. 

“Yes, the Cryptid. He doesn’t have an access card, but he can talk to FRIDAY. He has curly brown hair and bambi eyes, and he looks like he’s in high school.” 

Flash cringed. He had bought the Hello Kitty. He was going to lose his internship. For this. His parents were going to kill him. 

“Ah. I see.” 

“You know him?” Avery asked, her voice barely louder than a whisper. 

“Yes, I know who you are referring to. FRIDAY, did he have anything to do with this, or was it Tony?” 

Tony... Tony as in Tony Stark? What. The. Fuck. 

“I believe that Boss was posing as [redacted], and he asked the interns of Lab 12.A for Hello Kitty offerings after they sacrificed several objects to the Cryptid.” 

Pepper shook her head fondly and surveyed the amazed faces. “Don’t worry, none of you are in trouble. I apologize for Tony. ‘The Cryptid,’ as you call him, is completely harmless.” 

Not knowing what else to say, everyone nodded their heads like bobbleheads. 

\--- 

The next week, after the initial shock had worn off, Avery pulled out a giant bulletin board and pinned a piece of cardstock with the words: THE CRYPTID printed in block letters at the top. 

From there, the interns wrote down information they knew about him, including: 

\- curly brown hair 

\- doe eyes 

\- knows ms. potts 

\- knows mr. stark well enough to call him a ‘demon’ and for mr. stark to troll him 

\- has access to friday 

\- doesnt need an access card 

\- is a genius 

\- harmless?? 

\- something about hello kitty 

And from this, they could only conclude one thing: the Cryptid was some sort of shape-shifter, and he was secretly an Avenger. Probably Clint. 

\--- 

The next day, Tony Stark arrived at the lab, his mouth deep in a mug of coffee. 

“Mr. Stark!” Avery exclaimed. “It’s - you – hello! Welcome!” 

Mr. Stark nodded and scanned the lab. “Have any of you seen a giant Hello Kitty? About yay tall?” Mr. Stark gestured in the air and Flash gaped. Anthony Edward Stark was talking about HIS Hello Kitty! If only he could tell his parents... but they would probably just criticize him for buying something as silly as a Hello Kitty doll. 

“W-Well,” Avery said, the first to regain composure. “Ms. Potts came in here a little while back asking about it. Have you asked her?” 

Mr. Stark sighed and checked his watch. “FRI, tell the Cryptid I have the blood samples for him.” And then Mr. Stark left a room of gaping interns. 

“Is - Is Tony Stark trolling us?” Ciara asked, eyes darting from intern to intern. 

\--- 

The work day had begun like any other. Flash had swiped his card at 3:22 PM and headed to work on a program he had started, along with Maia. 

At 4:17, the alarms went off. 

“What the fuck!” Flash yelled as the sirens blared and the lights flashed, 

“Stay calm!” Ciara exclaimed. “Avery, what do we do?” 

Avery took a deep breath. “Lab directors have access to FRIDAY during emergencies. FRIDAY, what is the threat?” 

“An invasion, possibly from Hammer Tech. All lab occupants are to remain where they are at this time.” 

“What?” Ciara asked. “That doesn’t make any sense.” 

“Uh, why is that, FRIDAY?” Avery asked. 

“The intruders are most likely going to head to the labs, specifically any unoccupied ones. A security personnel is being dispatched to each lab.” 

The group collectively exhaled, and then inhaled sharply as they heard footsteps. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” Flash muttered, praying to any god that existed that the footsteps belonged to the security. They didn’t. 

“Hand over your projects!” Two men, armed with machine guns, exclaimed, waving their guns in Avery’s face. 

“W-W-What?” Avery asked, pushing her glasses up her nose. “What projects do you want? This is just a beginner intern lab -” 

“Shut up!” Man #1 exclaimed. “Give us the Iron Man suit plans.” 

“We don’t have access to those, sir, we’re only interns -” 

Man #1 fired three shots at an empty lab desk, which ricocheted off the bulletproof metal, bringing screams from the interns and a squeak of fear from Flash. “We’re serious, lady.” 

“Nah, she’s probably telling the truth. Those are like Stark’s babies. But we can hold these interns for ransom,” Man #2 explained.

Before Man #2 could respond, a boy leaped out from the vents and punched him across the room. Man #1 fired shot after shot after shot at the boy, but he dodged each one, and eventually threw a microscope at the back of the man’s head, knocking him out. 

“Holy shit,” Avery squeaked. 

“You’re the Cryptid!” Jonah exclaimed. 

Flash’s eyes bugged out of his head. The Cryptid? He had to get a good look. And then, Flash locked eyes with Peter fucking Parker. 

“Parker?!” Flash exclaimed, shakily standing up from behind a desk, where he had taken cover. 

“Flash?” Peter said, cocking his head to the side.

“You know the Cryptid?!” Exclaimed Li, pushing Flash playfully. 

“I didn’t know he was the Cryptid!” 

“Wait!” Peter exclaimed, face-palming. “You’re the ones that gave D-Mr. Stark all of that Hello Kitty shit? Fuck all of you.” Peter groaned softly. 

“Parker -” Flash said, eyes still wide, “How - how did you do that?” 

“Uh, well, I’ve been taking self-defense courses. I never used any of my, er, skills at school, because I didn’t care enough.” Peter stared at Flash for a second before turning his attention to the ceiling. “FRI, how’s the threat doing?” 

“Threat contained. Boss is currently on his way.” 

“What - I’m fine! I don’t even have a scratch on me!” 

“Peter, you have been grazed by a bullet on your side.” 

Peter raised an eyebrow and gaped when he saw a tear in his hoodie, a small amount of blood leaking through. “Huh.” 

“Okay, what the fuck?” Ciara said. “Who are you?” 

“I’m Peter?” 

But before they could continue to question him, Iron Man flew into the lab, and Tony Stark immediately receded from his armor and took Peter’s face in his hand, checking over him for injuries. 

“Oh my god,” Peter said, rolling his eyes as Mr. Stark pulled up his sweater. “It’s a tiny graze. It will heal by tonight.” 

Tony Stark then, to everyone’s bewilderment, took the Cryptid in his arms and kissed his forehead. “You’re okay, Bambino.” 

Peter leaned into the hug and smiled. “Yeah, Dad, I’m fine.” 

“Holy shit,” Flash whispered as Tony Stark carried Peter out of the room, dragging the unconscious criminals behind them. 

“His son,” Ciara whispered, face-palming. “It was right there the whole time.” 

“N-No!” Flash exclaimed. “That doesn’t make any sense! Peter’s an orphan.” 

Li raised an eyebrow. “Maybe that’s just what he said, instead of saying that Iron Man was his dad and all.” 

“No, he has a whole tragic backstory. He wouldn’t have just made that up. He had to watch his uncle take a bullet for him.” 

Everyone’s eyes softened. “Adopted?” Asked Ciara. 

Suddenly, Flash understood. “Holy shit. That’s why Mrs. Parker didn’t come to Career Day. I – holy shit. He always said that he was Tony Stark’s personal intern. I never believed him. I was a total dick.” 

\--- 

The next day, Flash ignored Peter at school, and Peter ignored Flash as well. It was kind of weird to go to the Avengers Tower for work after finding out the boy you’ve bullied since middle school lives there, but what could you do? 

He swiped his access card, and continued to work on the program with Maia. 

A few minutes later, Mr. Stark and Peter entered the lab, the former looking chipper and the latter staring daggers at the former. 

“Holy - Mr. Stark! Mr... Parker? Uh, what can we do for you?” 

Mr. Stark gave Avery a shit-eating grin. “Peter wanted to thank you for your offerings.” 

“Fuck off, Dad,” Peter muttered. “He was trolling you guys. FRIDAY alerted him that people were talking about me, so he went down to look and thought it was the funniest fucking thing he had ever heard, and things went from there.” Peter scuffed at the ground with the toe of his converse. 

“So, Tony Stark is your dad?” Li asked, eyes flitting from Mr. Stark to Peter. 

“Uh, adoptive.” 

“Now,” Mr. Stark said, clapping a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “I trust that this information won’t leave this room?” 

“N-Never, Mr. Stark!” Avery exclaimed. 

Mr. Stark nodded and glanced at Flash, as the rest of the interns stared in shock at Peter. “Alright, kid, let’s go.” 

\--- 

The next day, Flash apologized. 

The next week, Flash punched a kid who was making fun of Peter’s internship. 

The next month, Flash sat with Peter, Ned, and MJ. 

Friendship is one word, but it was a journey for Flash. A journey through understanding, jealousy, and Spider-Man, apparently. (What the fuck?)


End file.
